- W e e k l y R e p o r t # 1 -

Another blue monday...
and today also is ah t0i start fighting with the WAR first day,
remember not to push yourself too hard..just will get negative...
relax abit...and take care don't get sick..
Good Luck!!!

Last weekend nothing special,
cause of ah t0i busy with study and me busy with belly dance practice..
but this time having period very suffer...PAIN.. =(
cause of the fruit rojak..make me pain and feel uncomfortable few day..
Sunday went shopping with Ms.Charlene, she keep buying and me just look around..
but end up also get a dress la..hehe.....

About dance class there, keep thinking new step for my class and the belly dance..
this time join belly dance competition again,
with my studio belly dance teacher and ballet teacher...
we left not much time to plan the step, so we have to spend more time on it
but all of us also got our own class so the time hard to match also..
sometimes opinion not same also, so it make us getting more hard to done the dance..
sigh....................

- G a n b a t e h -

Support! Support!! Support!!!
ah t0i final exam coming on next week,
so he hard working to finish his assignment and study hard for his final exam..
*ganbateh* but have to take care too..
me can't do anything, i think the only thing i can do is be guai...
not to disturb, lau gai and etc.. =)
this week his schedule full already..study study study...
Hmmm......after all this my ah t0i graduate le.. =)
its our NEW LIFE begin too...
ah t0i will start working, so everything will got ABIT different..
have to face it...we will work it out..
everything be fine n smooth..

And also ganbateh for myself,
work hard on dance class and work there..
teach more class and practice for the belly dance competition..
*ganbateh*
and im still confuse, which one i should get?
and when is the right timing? argh..........

- E m p t y -

Hmmm....
Last weekend nothing special, sat follow ah t0i and his producer Ang go everywhere buy thing for sun ang's wedding photo shoot..Sun cause of ah t0i not sure will shoot until what time so dont dare bring me go, scare will late home then next day me cant wake up go work...
So me just guai guai stay home and wanna go carrefour buy some stuff to stock at home,
but mom suddenly not free cant go so me go alone =(

My brain feel so empty now...
but actually i got alot thing need to plan, but my brain like so empty..
like don't want to think don't know what to do...*argh.....*
so stuck...like wanna do all thing in the same time but can't..
dance step? music? belly competiton idea? my class timetable? new student?
keep feel like not enough time and etc...
NEED SOME IDEA!!!!!

Coming weekend same with last week too, will be nothing special and stay home..
cause this week he going shoot again..

- L o a d i n g -

Loading.....

I'm loading........

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Trying to be a lovely girl,

not to make people hate/angry/or don't like me..

Keep quiet...

...and...

SMILE =)

- The Bad Weekend -

oh no!! my office computer msn gone!
sigh......yesterday morning wake up head so heavy and pain,
maybe is last few day never really sleep well and woke up early..
so take one day leave again..
i feel abit guilty la..cause last few week also got take leave/mc in a week...
hmmm....find the whole day also cant found the msn, download install again but there showing 'you already have these program'..argh........

Hmmm....last saturday went to genting with ah t0i,pc and chralene see the 'mega live show',
cause of got free ticket from charlene and we no plan on sat so we go see see..
the show okok lo..
But saturday that day my mood not that good, and argue with him again..
end up we talk out everything again and finally nothing already...
But heart there like got a shadow already..

Sunday 4 of us go somewhere around putra jaya there a 'diamond event training'
cause of pc so we go support him, from morning 9am to 7smth..
argh...........tats my sunday!!! =(

last weekend reli is a bad week for me,
and this coming weekend will be nothing do again..

- Talk or Deal -

Last night is a bad worse night to me,

cause we having a war...

and this war almost can make a couple break up,

if both of them also don't listen and keep goin..

I tried to calm down myself at day,
to ready talk nicely with him after class..

but what i get the answer is talk on next day..

why got problem don't settle it as soon as possible?

He keep want me to clear my mind,

i feel so speechless....

Last night he talk everything, all my bad..

he want me to know want me to change,

keep say something bad word to hurt me...

the way he talk to me last night is wrong,

like deal-ing something with a customer..

he want me good,he want our future good and nice i know,

all the thing he told me last night i know too...

im trying....

like a computer load something also need some time to load it,

like a CD dirty or abit spoil already izzit need to take a longer time to load?

I'm loading my dar...

but not use to force....

I feel something different something change already...

so me don't know how should i face it..

now my feeling is?

- w h a t -

Still the same..

I also tried to talk first..

but.............

feel speechless on both of us..

heart feel so bad..

But last night got one thing let me feel happy too,

last night after work bring my tired mind n body walk go class,

the sky is crying and i forgot bring umbrella,

get wet abit, lucky not heavy rain..

reached studio at 610pm and start my class,

that is a private class for my student,

beside teaching her i share my dance experience with her,

and she also is a event organizer,

i know her from a show at low yat last year..

i told her sometimes i feel tired on dance life,

will stuck cause of music,step and no idea..

she told me i got improve on my dance,

she and some other student can see me is using the heart to teach them..

i feel so happy...

while i typing this blog i type about my dance life i feel relax,

and ready tonight talk nicely with my ah t0i..

but my msn suddenly pop up got msg from him...

we fight again......

- A Talk / An Answer -

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really speechless...

i tried to clear my mind the whole day today,

i feel im stuck there..

feel like my heart got alot question mark there..

feel like waiting a talk and need an answer...

but don't have...

even just now after class dinner with friend and him,

but never really talk..

until send me home also never talk about it...

thought after share my feeling with a girl friend will feel better,

but not really......

this time it make me think back alot thing,

alot unhappy memory...

i want try to just ignore it, but..........

i feel like need an answer or something...

or maybe just a talk....but he choose to ignore it..

maybe he ignore it cause don't want argue or etc..

he want me forget it too...

im trying..........

but..............

now my feeling is from angry to sad,

from sad to feel hurt,

from hurt to scare,

from scare to disappointed...

now all mix together....

i don't know he will read my blog or not..

if he do read my blog maybe he will feel me fan or etc,

maybe will make he feel 'fan gam' on me..

or etc........

i really don't know............

- L o s i n g -

Yesterday on leave, whole day be with him we having fun..

but till last night...one msg..

I found he lie to me......

I feel so angry sad n disappointed..

yes, he right..

he know i will don't like and get angry or etc so choice to hide it..

but once you get catch, so should you just tell the true?

but you no..you trying to cover it and keep lying...

it make me feel so sad and disappointed....

He think that me don't trust him,

yes..40%, but the 60% is i no confident on myself..

plus im very sensitive on that kind of thing,

i easy get angry, jealous, negatice mind and etc...

why my emotion will like this,

cause i care and serious on this relationship too,

but it is my problem too?

i think yes...i can't clear my mind,

all stuck there..my prob? he fault? im wrong? he right?

Sigh..........................

Like what he asked, why me wanna check him,

after check it then want to get angry argue or etc...

cause i really no confident on myself..

I think is my problem, cause everyone leave me cause of this..

cant stay long......

losing my mind..

losing my confident...

losing myself....

- Finally!!! -

Finally tat fella settle all the thing for me on friday..

If not..........I sure keep make noise everyday!! *hmmp*

Anyway...get it already..*haha...*

decorate it with doreamon, bear bear, and some pink! =D

and with full of my love~~~

*muax*

Really have to save more money already..

can't simply spend money le..

really have to think/plan for alot thing,

if never think/plan well on money there sure very poor T.T

i don't want be like that, so........CONTROL!!!

Last weekend me never really sleep enough,

mon-fri working,sat have to wake up early go for class..

No choice, cause wanna earn more money

so have to 'hei sang' my morning sleep time..

then sunday only sleep full full..

but last sun me follow ah t0i n his producer go putra jaya,

so have to wake up early too.. T.T

(if i don't follow i wont very sien at home after sleep full full wake up,

so me choose wake up early also follow they go)

so me wake up at 9am bath,change n get ready..

but wait till 1pm only out..cha dou!!!

me also fall asleep again after done everything..*swt*

Reach there at 2pm something really hot there,

my eyes also can't really open..

be their temporary talent take some picture,

but under the sun eyes can't really open big and not really ready for them to shoot so i think those picture sure not nice..

stay there till 5something, they found those location they want to take wedding picture (ah t0i's producer needed) and im tired too then we leave..

me and ah t0i go sunway 'yuen steamboat restaurant' have our dinner =p

reached there the restaurant outside although seem like alot people waiting,

but we never really wait long, cause we only two people =D

other all is big family or with few friend waiting there *haha...*

me eat alot tiger prawn again, yum-yum!!

Both of us not really eat alot but very FULL!

we never eat ice-cream also..

so can you imagine how full are we?

*LoL*

After our dinner back to ah t0i's house wait ah t0i finish bath then back to my house,

back to home bath, online awhile n watch HBO with ah t0i till 12something

ah t0i's face showing his sleepy face le, really look like ah t0i..

after lie on bed 5 - 10min ah t0i sleep like a pig already..=D

cause he tired too..

- A n g r y!!! -

Argh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Stupid fella!!
Last few day promise me friday can get it,
but called him just now to double confirm with him everything..
tat fella told me 'sorry miss, got some problem there so everything stuck..'
argh!!!!!!! me really fxxking angry!! really very angry (T.T)
kek 4 me somemore...ahhhhhh.....